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Author Archives: Muse Ink

Anticipation

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Bare earth or lovely veg?Remember the old ketchup adverts featuring the Carly Simon song “Anticipation” in which people tipped the glass bottle over and waited for the sauce to come out? Well, this week the feeling is reversed. After raking and weeding and pulling and levelling, Graeme and I are rather keen on planting. In fact, everyone who visited the garden-to-be saw not bare dirt but beans and lilacs and so on.

Potential for posiesWe did the work this past Wednesday and today I planned to fill a Zip car with greenery goodness. Apparently, other car-rental members had other ideas for the wheels. Like many of my plans, this one must be deferred, which is making me crazy because it’s perfect planting weather: warm, cloudy, and ready to rain this evening. Bah. Of course this kingdom shan’t be lost for want of a car, but it’s frustrating.

Perhaps it’s time for a related plan: what to plant, where and how. Lists! Yes, I’m good at those.

Weeded & Ready

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Ready for plants

After roughly seven hours of weeding, the garden is just about ready for plants. With Graeme’s help (or at the very least, his rake), I’ll level out the soil, fill in a few divets, and make it ready. The plot looks rather nice. There are few more little weeds to nick, but overall I’m rather proud of my hard work.

In need of levelling


Especially today when I pulled out a root that literally resembled a corkscrew. Made me wonder if I was doing the right thing; if perhaps the thing would come alive, twist round my body, and drag me off to a worm-infested netherworld. That’s what you get for watching too much British sci fi.

Twisted root


Too tired to think now. Just need a shower and a beer!

My Green and Pleasant Land

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Much more presentable.

I took a break last week as there were a lot of bags to be picked up and I didn’t want to add to them. This week I was just plain unwell yet I didn’t want to fall off the wagon. My determination was fuelled by a “threat” from a customer who took one look at my work in progress and told me he was a landscape designer. I told him that I was revitizling the plot myself, actually. He responded by saying he could make a “storybook garden” out there that would “increase business.” Ok, I know this little plot isn’t mine, but I suddenly felt that my green and pleasant land would be turned into a Disney-esque designer showpiece with frou-frou blossoms in every shade of pink.

Potting ingredients


Of course, anything “designed” comes with a price, so I’m fairly certain my amateur attempt at horticulture is secure. I also respect people hustling for work. Hell, I do it. But it got me thinking about the concepts of profit and ownership. This fellow hoped to make some money beautifying a 12-x-16 plot and add it to his portfolio. What is my profit? The veg I hope to harvest. The satisfaction that my toil and sweat makes the land work again. The relief of being able to leave my home once a week for something that isn’t a job. These are worth a lot more to me that I expect an invoice is to a landscape designer.

Go Reds!


With apologies to William Blake: Bring me my geramiums of red and pink; Bring me my bags of soil; Bring me my spade: O clouds unfold! Bring me my pots of plastic resin!

Two spots of colour. Two pots of potential. And one lovely woodpecker to boot.

Woodpecker!

Diggin’

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Diggin'


Not much to say to today except that despite the sweat and effort, I don’t think I got a lot done.Yet I filled two more bags with crap. The soil’s good; lots of worms. The root systems are insane! I must say, the two things I’m glad I bought are gloves and wellies. Yes, spades and trowels are great, but my hands and feet are happier for protection.

Being neighbourly

Cut down more vines, which were growing into the neighbour’s yard. They will be happy. While the things are beasts, they almost look like they were planted on purpose then forgotten. There’s so much potential back there.

Dirt: the home of many worms

Dug out some stumpy weeds that I had cut down. It was about 6 degrees Celcius today, so I needed a coat, but I sweated it out. Too much info? Tough. Gardening is work, no question; at least starting one is. Ok, rephrase that: reviving one that has been ignored for years is work.

Book Review: The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides

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I had misgivings as I began reading Jeffrey Eugenides’ third novel, The Marriage Plot, but I stuck with it. Something kept me turning the pages, despite some clichés. I wanted to know what happened. Through the mania, the self-discovery, the self-doubt, I stayed with the characters and the author’s effortless prose. Right to the last word of the right and proper ending. Glad I did.

The Marriage Plot is a coming-of-age story centred on three American university graduates—Leonard, Madeleine, and Mitchell—who form a love triangle. The book’s title, and the main narrative arc, is based on the role of marriage in the Victorian literary novel. Set in the early eighties, the three characters meet at Brown University in Rhode Island, where, like most campuses, chinwagging and sex seem to take up most students’ time.

My initial misgiving began in the first half of the book. Eugenides seems to assume the reader knows about the era and the schools of literary thought. Perhaps this is an outgrowth of his time teaching at Princeton University between the release of the Pulitzer-prize winning Middlesex and this novel, as it seems are the somewhat clichéd characterizations. Nevertheless, his skills prevail: “In Madeleine’s face was a stupidity Mitchell had never seen before. It was the stupidity of all normal people. It was the stupidity of the fortunate and beautiful, of everybody who got what they wanted in lie and so remained unremarkable.” Lines such as that make the John Hughes–like tropes forgivable.

It’s worth noting that he also edited My Mistress’s Sparrow is Dead: Great Love Stories from Chekhov to Munro (2008). In the introduction, he wrote: “It is perhaps only in reading a love story (or in writing one) that we can simultaneously partake of the ecstasy and agony of being in love without paying a crippling emotional price. I offer this book, then, as a cure for lovesickness and an antidote to adultery. Read these love stories in the safety of your single bed. Let everybody else suffer.”

I raise this because the tone of the stories he selected for the anthology—the pain and agony that love (shared, unrequited, or otherwise) can and does bring—seems to colour The Marriage Plot, making it a bitter-sweet novel.

Weeding Redux

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Many hands

Much better!


They say that many hands make for light work. After I wrote my last post, I got a message from Graeme. Seems he wanted to get in on the raking and weed-pulling action. I think I’ll promote him from advocate to partner in soil.
Footprints

Have tools, will rake.

Lillies

First Day: Substantive Edit

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First Day

A job well done.

It was supposed to rain today so I hadn’t planned to garden; however, when faced with a day stuck indoors wrestling colons, I chose precipitation over punctuation.

Plus, I got to christen new tools that my friend Jenny helped me pick out at Canadian Tire. We share a love for that institution. When I was little I used to look forward to going with my dad to look at tools. Yes, the little girl who read princess books and wanted very much to be a ballerina also had a fascination for hammers and nails. Looking back, I think it was all about the potential those things held. What could be fixed and built? Anything.

And so it goes with the garden. Grasping my new pruners in my new leather gardening gloves, I hacked and slashed. I knew that once the overgrown Unidentified Prickly Thing was cut away, the potential for this square footage would make itself known.

I was ruthless. Cut! Snip! Slash! The growth felt like useless words hiding the bones of a great story. I was determined. Sure, when I looked at the lovely green vine-type plant with the bright red berries creeping up the western fence, I hesitated. Maybe it really was something worth keeping. Then I pulled, and when I did, the wires stretched overhead moved. “Right. You’re gone, plant.”

My co-worker (and advocate) Graeme came out to see how I was doing. “Wow! You really went at it.” He surveyed the grounds and pointed to a hole in the ground. “Just so know, I think there’s a rats’ nest down there. I saw one the other day.”
“You’re sure? I saw a mouse yesterday.”
“Yep, The thing was big.”
“Crap.”
“We have squirrels and racoons too. We’ll figure it out.”

Rats!

"Incidentally, Rat Keller means literally, in German, cellar of rats. That's not seller of rats, a seller of rats, a person who sells rats for a living to another man as it were, of course not."---Eric Idol from The Rutles: All You Need Is Cash


Sigh. Yeah, I’m sure we will. For now, I need to finish clearing the land.

My Challenge (aka: Biting off More than I Can Chew?)

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My challenge

My challenge: to turn my bookstore’s backyard into a working vegetable garden. My mission: to harvest the fruits of my labour and preserve them for good eats in the autumn and winter.  Great idea until my knees started giving me a hard time. “Sod them,” I thought, “I can do this. I’ll find a work around! I shall prevail!”

The west side with the Unidentified Prickly Growing Thing.

Today, spine intact, I hobbled to the hardware store, cane in hand, to buy me a rake, some paper garden bags, and gloves. “Gonna get some good work done,” says I. “It’ll be nice and tidy and clean.” Did you know that rakes can impale? It’s true! I nearly found out today how bad they are for strangers’ eyesight. Oh, I also realized that my local, independent, family-run, hardware store is nearly impossible to manouvre through when your hobbled with a cane, a rake, a purse, garden gloves, and two packets of garden bags.

Before

Big tree with matching roots...and a lovely pile of mulch that I will mix in once I get a spade.

I did, however, meet a lovely Italian woman who, upon seeing me so hobbled, asked me the time. Well, having not been raised in a barn, I balanced my load (don’t ask me how, I forget) and politely told her. Whereupon, she offered to take my bags and help me up the road. Much easier and far more plesant than I imagined. Yes, today would be good.

Got to the store, dumped my stuff, and prepared to rake. Got one bag filled. The garden, such as it is, is a bloody eyesore full of prickly unidentified growing things that by rights ought to have a Doctor Who episode written about them. (Hmm…idea there, methinks.) Now I’m faced with the fact that I’ve bitten far more off than I think I can, in fact, chew let alone preserve.

Before

The east wall with some proper growth of god knows what. It's gone. I don't care.

Right then, I have a task ahead of me. April will see me tackle the Evil Prickly Growing Thing! I shall dig up the yard and make it fertile. And it will be good. Really. Allons-y!

Pinko

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Many of my feminist friends who have little boys have given in to the reality that their toddlers love things with wheels. While they will provide their children with a wide array of choices, wheels win out. This, of course, is perfectly fine. Wheels needn’t be branded; they just move and occasionally make noise. If it keeps the little darlin’ quiet and out from underfoot, all the better.

Only a few of my friends have little girls, so their propensity toward certain toys remains uncertain. If the daughters who squeal through my store on any given Sunday are anything to go on, however, then animals are the go-to item. Anything pink also seems to grab their attention and if it has glitter, well, the battle for gender neutrality seems lost. At least this is the sentiment some mums have when they reluctantly purchase very pink glittery books (often featuring Barbie) for their wide-eyed children. Mum grimaces at the book, looks down at the cherub, confirms that this is in fact what she wants to read, sigh, and hands me $5.24 with tax. This transaction is completed with what appears to be an apologetic look to me as if to say, “I tried and failed to raise a non-stereotypical girly-girl. I’m a bad mum.”

I’m sure my mum had the same expression once upon a time when I announced I wanted a pink bedroom—and got it. Oh, how I loved princess books and Barbie—and I got those as well (driving the children’s librarian at Bendale library nutty, I’m sure.) I even wanted to be a ballerina. Mum drew the line there, correctly convinced it was too expensive, would ruin my feet, and that my interest lie in tutus not pirouettes.

When I admit my childhood love of pink and princesses, I tell them that I grew out of it, that it won’t last forever, and that dinosaurs, bicycles, and playing the mud took over at about age six. In other words, stay vigilant, Mum, and be ready for grass stains and bruised shins.

Yes, pink is for little girls. Not for grown women. Sadly, some adult females and those who market to us need reminding of this. For many, shopping is a chore, not a hobby. While I like pretty clothes and shoes, they don’t define me. I’d like to think my character is more dynamic than that. Yes, I enjoyed Sex in the City, but if I were to pick a female character to emulate it would be Gwen Cooper from Torchwood. She has much more going on than any of the stick-like stereotypes from the hit rom-com. And I would wager she likes her beer brown not pink.

Globe and Mail columnist Katina Onstad seems to agree. In her recent piece, ““What Women Don’t Want: Pink Beer, Pink Cars, a New Pink Ghetto,” she argues against the infantilization of women by marketing execs. Apparently, we won’t buy a smartphone or a hockey shirt or a beer unless it’s pink.

Bollocks.

Why would an adult woman want to be treated like a child when she can, in fact, birth one? Why would she buy into the cult of pinkness in order to combat a very adult disease such as breast cancer? You want me to buy your phone, tell me about what it can do, not how goddamn “cute” it is. You want me to buy your beer, leave the inflate-a-babes out of the ad campaign.

Honestly, it’s not that hard.

Welcome!

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Welcome to my new abode! I expect to do some more renovations around the place, so watch your head and mind the wet paint.

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